This – wisdom – of the author’s is certainly flawed. Its purpose is to start discussion. Use all of Solomon’s wisdom as you guide this conversation! The critical nature of this subject cannot be overstated. C. S. Lewis has some very wise things to say about the importance of human sexuality. It revolves around the truth of human procreation – something in which no created being in the spirit world (dimension) can participate. It is a wonder – and is attacked more viciously than any other part of human existence. Know you are well settled in this area before you even think of leading others through this section.
This world is sex saturated. And it is almost all unhealthy. Some estimates are that 75% of our kids in public high schools have had multiple sexual relationships. Even in some middle schools that number is close to 50%. Fortunately there are signs of a dramatic lessening of consensual sex in young people – but not a reduction in coerced sexual activity. Both by emotional pressure and actual physical abuse. If we, as adults, don’t admit and reject our past foolishness (sin) individually and as a society, how can we lead our children into a safer and better future? How can those damaged by this scourge find healing?
This entire section is highly age sensitive. Use wisdom here! If you are working with youth, and you are not the parent or guardian, get permission before proceeding. If you haven’t read Why Gender Matters, by psychologist and family physician Leonard Sax, you probably should. Besides the main thrust of his work, Dr. Sax gives a chilling account of sexuality in children of our modern society. Your children, no matter how sheltered, may very well be exposed to raw sexuality before they are ten years of age. In person or on screen. You can let the world at large determine their understanding – and actions – or you can guide them yourself.
If you are working with adults the discussion may be difficult to get started. Considering the prevalence of misuse and abuse this may be very sensitive in a gender mixed group. In fact it is almost certainly more wise to split the group so discussion can be made more freely. This is true even with, maybe especially with, married couples. Curiously it can work for men to lead a woman’s discussion group but I’ve never seen a group of men who would successfully discuss this with a woman leading them. Sorry, we’re just not as capable in that way. Still, wisdom would seem to dictate having a woman lead a women’s group.
What Hope, A Fool? is – for most of us out of our teens. And for many who are younger yet. Be ready to listen to the pain – many must go through it before they can get to the healing. For this entire section you will be more facilitator than participant. If you don’t have any training or experience in counseling get some help from someone who has.
The Allure of the Helpless Woman and The Maturity Mirage are gender specific. It may prove useful to read the other, but if you do (it’s certainly optional) start with that section specific to the gender of your subject(s). These were written for the youth of today – so take that into account if you are working with children or adults. Some of the information is very direct, and yet much is left out. The amount of wisdom required to decide what should be brought into the discussion is not small! Get all the help you can. And, dads, you may be able to speak about this with your daughters, but consider that it might be wiser for a woman to do so. Boys, moms, really, really, need a man with whom to speak. I know you want to deal with it, but, please, consider the wisdom of finding a trustworthy man (hopefully their father) to talk through this.
Solomon used human sexuality as his illustration of the wise – and of the fool. There’s a reason for that. Understand what it means – and how all this connects to Yahweh.
Words to clarify.
Sections or phrases of importance or interest.
Copyright Rick Henderson, Th.M. 2026, SouthBeachHope@gmail.com